Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Monday-turned-Tuesday post

Sunday morning, I awoke at 3:15. I managed to get back to sleep for about an hour before I awoke again. Unable to go back to sleep, I got up and took my blanket into the living room where I checked my email and did some knitting until daylight.

Monday morning, sleep vanished for good at 6:15. Though I tried for about 20 minutes to go back to sleep, it was useless. So I reluctantly dragged myself out into the 28 degree morning to begin my day. Let the chickens out of the coop and give them a morning scoop of feed. Continue knitting in the recliner with my cozy blanket.

Make coffee at 8:00. Knit, knit, and knit some more. I had some items that had to be mailed out yesterday, so I was able to complete them for mailing. Felted one of the items. Listened to the ticking of the clocks and thought about the passage of time.

I am a little scattered with the start of the year and all of my goals and obligations. They are not making me lose sleep, but for various reasons, I am losing sleep all the same. Have been now for over a year. I thought about my grandmother and how she always woke up between 5 and 6 a.m. (or sometimes earlier). I always thought she was crazy for getting up instead of going back to sleep.

Now I know. When sleep fled, it was gone until the next night. End of discussion. No amount of pleading or lying in bed waiting would bring it back. Fast forward some years, and I am in that sleepless dungeon as well. I missed the memo about it beginning before the age of 40.

This morning, when I awoke at 5:00, I fought back. It took an hour, but I did get to sleep again. For another hour or so. The ageless (younger) me that resides in my mind inside this body that cannot possibly be "middle aged!" cringes at the sentence above about getting up to knit until daylight.

As someone who has always
loved and valued
my sleep time,

I am not at all
reconciled to
this turn of




Kate Burton said...

I was 38 when it started and over the last couple of year it has varied. I find that my clock seems to be off from the rest of the universe. If I take something to sleep all it does is make me feel worse.

Hope you get a nice long night tonight, if not you can always blog right?!?

Lenox Knits said...

I've always had sleep issues and I'm really scared for the day that you describe to come. At least you are able to do something useful with the time.

Splendid Little Stars said...

I hear you and am right there with you! A cup of Sleepytime plus tea before bed helps me.

Sinclair said...

Mmmmm, I love sleepytime tea!