Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day to all moms out there!
I hope your day has you soaring with the birds

In the past, I have heard my mother say that if she had mothering to do over, she would do it better the second time around. Though as a mother, I can certainly identify with that statement, I must say that I think my mom did a great job the first time around.

We all have our faults. And, I suppose, my mom had hers. Like, for instance, she used to suck up my teeny tiny toys in the vacuum cleaner and, to my most dire agony, they were never to be seen again. She listened to Erma Bombeck which colored her visions of how parents and children should interact.

That color was the color of sarcasm. (I can't blamer her, really; she came by it via genetic code.) She threatened to drop us at the orphanage. She sang the song, "This is the day we give babies away (play on words with "a weigh") with a half a pound of tea...if you know any ladies who want any babies, just send them around to me..." compliments again of Ms. Bombeck.

But, in the end, sarcastic parenting aside, she has really been the best mom anyone could have. And I love the dry wit and sarcasm. In our family, it is what makes us who we are, and what binds us all together in the straightjacket. My mom cared about our grades and she always made sure she knew what we were doing in school. She made sure that she knew our friends. She always knew where we were, and always made us check in when we were out playing all over the neighborhood.

She cooked for us EVERY SINGLE DAY, and we always sat down at the table all together for dinner. And, while she was not one to "play" with us a lot, she made sure that all our needs were met and that we were safe, clean, healthy and well-mannered. She made certain that we knew how to be respectful and how to do household chores. She made sure we knew how to properly eat at the table.

Even into my adulthood (when I lived close enough to her), she would make me cream of potato soup when I was ill. To this day, when I experience one of life's triumphs or defeats, she sends me a card and a note. She always finds the perfect card, and if she doesn't find it, she makes it herself.

She paints, draws, writes wonderful fiction, and has begun to garden. Her children are successful in many ways with wonderful families of our own now. Her grandchildren are well-mannered and successful in school. If she has a fault, it is that she has not yet finished the fiction story begun some 25 years ago and I have been hanging on that cliff for many years to know the outcome.

She still wonders what she could have done better. What she could have done more. I say, she did everything right. We wouldn't be who we are if she had done anything different, better or worse, more or less. I think she was perfect as a mother just the way she did it the first time. She taught us that it is important that you choose friends who mirror your loyalty and values. It does matter where you place your allegiances. It does matter what choices you make in life.

She taught us how to work through adversity. How to stand tall and stay strong. She had defeats and difficulties in life, but she used those to teach us how to act in the face of difficulty. If she hadn't had any problems in life, we would have missed out on valuable lessons. Because she met all problems with extreme fortitude and strength, we know how to be strong, loyal, and steadfast. We know how to treat other people with caring, dignity, and respect.

So, as we all honor our mothers this day, I want to assure my mother that she did a wonderful job, and I wouldn't change any part of the way she carried out the job of mothering. I might, however, change my daughtering skills a bit if I were to do it all over. I would show her all the way through that I appreciate her and love her endlessly. And, if I had it to do over, I would have sent her a card today. (I forgot to get it in the mail in time! Bad daughter!)

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.
I love you.



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1 comment:

tamdoll said...

This is a beautiful post. Your mom is lucky that you can appreciate all she's done.

Being a mom is the hardest work I've ever experienced - I'm an emotional basket case, 2nd guessing everything I do. I've even apologized to my kids, telling them "I've never done this before." At least I have crafting to keep me sane.

& thanks for stopping by my blog!